I am exhausted and this Christmas, so far, hasn’t brought me much joy.
There is so much I should be doing, but for days now I just can’t make myself.
The only realisations I’ve had this year are depressing:
1. I never win anything.
2. There are all these women for whom the beauty is effortless. So perfect, so pretty, fragrant, fashionable, everything around them is just so. I love seeing them but it makes me so sad that I am not one of them.
3. I am such a loser, it’s not even funny.
4. Nobody cares. Ok, apart from a handful of people, nobody cares.
What I’d like to ask from Santa for next year:
1. Be well enough to travel, do yoga and take photos regularly.
2. Write a bestseller, earn loads of money and move somewhere sunny, by the sea.
3. Buy a sky blue VW camper van all kitted out for trips and camping.
I’ve got nothing else.
Happy Holidays...
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8 comments:
Well, first of all you should take a good break from everything. Just indulge yourself and be selfish for a change because it is difficult to be happy and joyful when you're exhausted. I know, it's hard to let go everything when you constantly have a list of things in your head that you have to do. But try. And after everything will be so much easier.
I was falling apart last few months, just because I couldn't say no to everything that was going on around me, and I became so lifeless and exhausted, which was of course worst case scenario. After a small nervous breakdown I decided to take it easy because I want to live my life, not surviving it. So this holidays I'm just taking it easy, and trying to remember all the nice things from this year, and forget this last two-three months.
And I found myself writing so many times not so positive posts on my blog, so people asked me why I'm so negative (which of course I'm not really), but blog is a sort of psychiatrist for me, and if I bitch about life virtually, I'm less difficult in RL :).
So I understand the need for writing down things, and I don't believe people who have all the pink posts on their blogs. That's not real life.
I wish you that the next year will be better than previous and I'm sending good vibrations for health and lots of energy, because when you have those two, all wishes from your list must happen :)
Thank you so much my dear, for such kind words :hug: You are right, and I will try to enjoy myself for the rest of the holidays, believe me, I really want to.
I know how you feel, and I was wondering reading the posts too, not thinking you were being negative but just so incredibly busy, it seemed way too much work! It is a really good idea to write the problems and frustrations, and get them out, but on the blog, readers often get the impression we are only what we write on the blog, whereas in reality, what we write is just a small aspect. Some people like to pretend that everything is perfect, maybe that makes them feel better. But certainly, as a reader, I find blogs like that really annoying :D
Thank you my dear, for the best wishes, health and lots of energy are exactly what I was hoping for and I wish the same to you :)
what is this, some kind of collective depression thing going on;) ? for one, I wish you all the best in year to come and to forget all the bad stuff from this one to go(huh, I thought you left this place, good to see you;)))
i ja tebe osjećam kao weird sort of friend koju vjerojatno neću nikad upoznati uživo ali uostalom jel to uopće bitno? dok dijelimo emocije, tješimo se međusobno od svakidašnjeg ludila na koji nailazimo i koji želi preuzeti danak u našim životima. Niti se ne moramo čitati svaki put ali toliko smo se "pročitali" da je nastala spona :) Inače želim ti sve najbolje i kad nisu blagdani. Biti u lošem fazonu nije ništa loše i sasvim je noroalna stvar. Ja sam mjesec i pol bio u kurcu jer sam počeo razmišljati da sam upisao krivi faks i da me nitko neće zaposliti i da ću još mnogo vremena živjeti kod roditelja i da se neću tako skoro osamostaliti ali hej ionako se stvari mijenjaju iz dana u dan pa je nemoguće pogoditi što će zapravo biti. Kao i uvijek draga Ana, čitamo se !
Well, you know, actually, knowing that I'm not the only depressed one makes me feel better :D
Thank you my dear, same to you :hugs:
No, I'm still around, just not blogging often at the moment.
@neverin: upravo se tako i ja osjecam, i zahvalna sam ovom internetu jer je omogucilo da se ljudi povezu i prijateljstva odrzavaju na puno vece distance nego prije.
Hvala i tebi takodjer, zelim sjajnu novu godinu, da ti se sve lijepo poslozi i u emocionalnom i poslovnom zivotu! Znam kako je kad tek zavrsis faks, kad imas volju i zelju zapoceti novi zivot, neka tebi slijedeca godina bude sjajan pocetak cvrstih temelja sretne buducnosti :))
Your Top 4 points/realizations sound quite familiar :)
Cheers & good luck in 2012.
DM
Thank you my dear, for the comment and for the tip, I really appreciate it!
And all the best in the New Year! :hugs:
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